for this year, I'd quite like to be me. no fads, trends, aspirational and unattainable daydreaming. just me as I am each day.
'The Repast of the Lion', Henri Rousseau (ca. 1907) |
-- "OH IT'S VINTAGE CHANEL," she shouts into you completely innocently, trying to overrule the heady bass of the club with her voice. so she saw you sizing up those infamous double Cs then. you couldn't really make her out - her roar was a whisper in this thumping cavernous place where no one can truly be heard for all the noise - but you know exactly what she said. it's actually a really bloody nice dress, which makes you more annoyed. you're totally green and that's only in part the pulsing lasers, so you just smile and keep dancing like you didn't hear a thing. oh you petty little b tch.
That's my take on the whole 'quiet luxury' thing. it lost its appeal the moment it opened its mouth, and it kind of taints everyone that attempts to partake in this watery mess of a trend (in my lofty and irrelevant opinion, but also hi, colour me guilty). it's almost like proponents of the term forgot what the word quiet ever meant..like as soon as you attempt to explain the mysteries of class and affluence, any semblance of affinity or power you thought you held in that realm vanishes. ooo but maybe that's exactly what they wanted all along: power to the People? sociopolitically subversive fashion gurlies, that i can get behind.
but aside from those very rare gems, are the rest of us, in our haste to greedily consume this latest fad, the eternally feeding lion up above? or are we really the unidentifiable bloody mass that will forever dangle limp from its mouth.
'The Musicians', Caravaggio (Michelangelo Merisi) (1597) |
-- why i've been craving it i have a vast collection of shirts and even a couple of white ones i'll admit, but not one that quite gives me the volume and shape i've been wanting to wear with my straight leg or tapered trousers, or with my mini and midi skirts. crisp is a word that comes to mind, one which i've been wanting to feel whenever i reach into my wardrobe but i'm yet to pull out in the form of this specific type of white shirt
what exactly i've been craving oversized, feels like it'd swamp me if it wasn't for the more structured fabric - cotton poplin - so more like a light tent that might blow away if not pinned down or tucked in, i want the shirt to literally hold its own, unlike the two white shirts i currently own; optical white, not off white; a curved or interesting hemline, regular sized and not too stiff collars - i hate big intrusive collars that won't stay away from my jawline whenever i shrug or turn my head
ways in which i'd wear this white shirt with everything technically. as i say, i've got a good many casual shirts in my collection and they all pair best with my jeans and casual trousers/skirts but what i really want this for is to add to my work uniform. i don't actually have a dedicated work-appropriate white cotton poplin shirt and i'd like that gap closed. it's not urgent. nothing in fashion ever is obviously, but i will continue to hunt for one preferably second hand that can do stuff like this but on my own body:
'The Dream of the Shepherd' ('Der Traum des Hirten'), Ferdinand Hodler (1896) |
-- I'm back. No, not with a vengance but with a bashful "uh, hi" - uttered in the kind of way your wayward older brother would upon returning home from an unplanned five year 'break' from a very prestigious university degree to which he never intends to return after having found 'spirituality' abroad... why yes, i have been watching far too many 90s and 00s rom coms/dramas in my long 3-ish year absence. your point?
a lot has shifted since my last post here. I became a mother to the most wondrous, beautiful little boy. I also got made redundant, launched and let peter out into nothingness an online vintage store, got a more stable job in the civil service, and had several existential crises along the way because a lot of things i'd come to know about myself were coming undone all at once.
in a moment of candidness: i really did lose a grip on reality through the tumult and massive upheaval of life as i then knew it. Dear Reader, do not underestimate just how much a dramatic change in circumstance can alter your dress sense, your tastes, how you consume content and the pace at which you purchase products even. let's just say i was doing the most on youtube and my burner insta account where i fastidiously follow all my fave fashion gurlies, all while propping up beyond retro, vestiaire, ebay etsy depop and a few luxury resale sites with my terrible online shopping habits (this week's video is sponsored by klarna... i hate you klarna).
you get the picture: i've had a bad couple of years of out of control spending in order to regain a sense of self and control and enjoy what i wear again at a time when my body size and shape went through a period of flux. ironic. was it all worth it? probably not. fashion rarely is worth spending lots of £££s on even if it's over a course of years or on things you'll ultimately 'love now and wear forever' (oh myyyy how i hate hearing the fashion gurlies whack that phrase out when they're trying to convince you to buy something you really dont need). but if you've got the disposable dolla and you're as emotionally invested in looking/feeling sick af as you are financially, then sure why not i guess......
i've made many many MANY purchases ive regretted, i've become far more easy to influence than ever before (i confess Monikh Dale and Brittany Bathgate have me on a leash and i will follow them to the ends of the earth tbh, i stand by that), but i've also got a wardrobe that aligns with who i feel i am at this moment in time, and will probably be for a long time still. simply put: it makes me feel so f cking good when i put together an outfit thats pure fireemoji in my eyes (see a few crudely collaged egs below).
i've enjoyed the thrill of thrifting, the hunt for the hard to find piece in the outfit puzzle that'll make about 20 different things in my wardrobe instantly less difficult to style every day... i could go on about this, but i think what i want to say on my return to this blog, is that i'm really ready to stop spending now. it's just bloody exhausting watching myself on that hamster wheel of consumerism and not knowing how to get off it for good before it goes somewhere i really don't want it to.
i'm back here to observe and to commentate. the difference now is that i'm not here to encourage spending. i won't be linking anything (its not like i get a commission anyway) - in fact, you can think of this blog henceforth as simply a moodboard or an unpolished repository of my thoughts on style, like it was originally meant to be.
I hope you enjoy all that is to come, i know i certainly will xo
'Still Life with Apples and a Pot of Primroses', Paul Cézanne (ca. 1890)
-- at some point in my late teens/early 20s (speaking as if I left those years behind long ago and I'm not only about to turn 26 at the end of this year) my Catholic mother introduced my newly-awakened Catholic self to 'modest dressing'. The fad lasted about a year between us before we gave up on the pretence of everyday elegance we claimed the midi skirts afforded us - we soon returned to our old faithful jeans and t-shirts, and I to my shorter hemlines as I went through university. The minis I tend to gravitate towards now, while not impractically short, do allow me to show off my best assets. I'm still debating what the point is in dressing to 'show off' and whether it's morally 'okay' (does it lowkey/highkey fuel negative body image issues etc), but that's another faith-flavoured kettle of fish. . .
While I fight that inner battle, here are a few short shift dresses for a variety of occasions, which I think reflect an element of the elegance I once feverishly pursued. There really isn't much to say about them other than I will forever love fairly modest (eyyy) pops of colour and lines. Lots of lines.
'Bashi-Bazouk', Jean-Léon Gérôme (1868–69)
--two days into the new year and I’d already planned my three piece wardrobe for the first quarter, inspiration boards for which have been suitably Pinned and links to each potential item safely bookmarked. Is this the sort of dedicated consumer of fashion I have always been? Probably. But I will rest easier in the knowledge that my consumption has drastically slowed and been refined over the last few years, especially compared to how starving young seunny continuously lusted after, eventually bought, wore once and then promptly tossed her fast fashion buys.
The shame.
Now, though, I like to think of the slow fashion lifestyle I’m trying to adopt in terms of gradually decelerating over the years. In case you were wondering what the three piece wardrobe has to do with this, it is derived from something French women apparently invented (originally as the five piece wardrobe), likely to ensure they consumed wisely: in terms of quality rather than quantity. The idea is that you pick three (or five if you're French) new pieces that complement your existing wardrobe built on sturdy basics, while adding an element of uniqueness & novelty, obviously not in the throwaway trend sense. At the moment, I’m seeking out a light grey pair of joggers, a pair of chunky loafers and a leather miniskirt - something I’ve been looking for for a couple of years now.
An important caveat to this list is that all items are always subject to change, but I do still like to take my sweet time thinking about why I want each piece, how and when I would wear them etc. Funnily enough, the more disposable income I have thanks to this ravenous capitalist world whose ladders I'm bent on scaling for my ultimate comfort, the less I'm keen to throw it at highly transitory and ultimately unnecessary things that don’t give me a little bit of everyday joy. This must be how the rich get & stay rich...
My keenest friends will notice below that I've included items from sustainability-focussed brands as well as my beloved Beyond Retro. They're not the cheapest, but I guess neither is being a bit more eco-friendly towards the planet when it comes to producing brand new products.
BLACK LEATHER SKIRT (Large) - Vintage
Organic Cotton Track Pants - The Pangaia
ALEX W Black Polished Leather Shoes - Vagabond
-- since every basic b*tch and her dog now has a 'trusty blazer' in her closet these days, I naturally jumped on the bandwagon and stole one from my dad so that I too could feel like part of the fashionable In Crowd. For those who do not happen to have a sartorially impeccable and generous parent, I've found some vintage blazers I'd readily part my dolla with if I wasn't trying to stop overspending on things I really don't need. And I've even included a couple of 'affordable' (read: sub £150 - I'll let you decide if that's affordable or not) designer finds in there for you. You're very welcome. In other news, I think this whole 'letting go' via the blog thing might be working...
'Oleanders', Vincent van Gogh (1888)
--I don't know why I've been posting so many dresses on here, as if I ever live in anything other than knitwear and jeans through winter. I will, however, undoubtedly go back to dresses in the near future because they are pretty and a girl can dream (but definitely not buy). For now though, here are some pretty cardigans I recently found on a vintage platform that is not Beyond Retro (it's a French website called Imparfaite Paris). Naturally, I want to buy all of them, but I've managed to stifle that near maddening desire. For now:
'Navagunjara, a Universal Form of Krishna', India (ca. 1835)
—another thing I have come to know about myself in relation to my style: I’m really a person of extremes and contradictions. I like to half-jokingly call myself a ‘midaximalist’, one who is both in the middle and at either end of the scale all at once. It’s not that I don’t want or like my tastes to be pinned down to one overarching theme - believe me, I’ve tried to do the pinning myself but none of the labels stay put for long. I like everything and nothing at one moment or another, and it can be exciting but it can also be frustrating given I'm trying to keep my wardrobe relatively small. . . here are a few very different dresses that all nod to these very different & fluid versions of myself:
'Joséphine-Éléonore-Marie-Pauline de Galard de Brassac de Béarn (1825–1860), Princesse de Broglie', Jean Auguste Dominique Ingres (1851–53)
––the problem with finding things that you love for the sole purpose of letting them go is that, you guessed it, it is incredibly hard to then let them go once found. Hark, a strange metaphor for my new blogging endeavour: let's consider this space a personal gym in which I can begin to exercise the muscles that are supposed to unclench my fists.
And so since I seem to be obsessed with dresses at the moment, and with Christmas fast approaching, here are some quirky Christmassy dresses I'm using as dumbbells & trying desperately to let go of:
ABOUT ME
Hi, I'm Seun, a 28 y/o creative something-or-other living in the UK.
Welcome to my repository of ramblings centred on style and art & a few things that I want but can only half possess through the medium of blogging. Please enjoy.
Welcome to my repository of ramblings centred on style and art & a few things that I want but can only half possess through the medium of blogging. Please enjoy.
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